The big news that was coming this month that I have written about in previous posts came this past week. On Wednesday, Andrew received the letter that we have been waiting on and it wasn't exactly what we were hoping for. Actually, it wasn't what we were hoping for at all.
With the recent experience of applying for college, a masters program and medical school (2 years ago), we have come to find that a thin letter is never a bearer of good news. When I went to get the mail on Wednesday and saw the envelope, my stomach dropped but I remained hopeful. I then proceeded to run from our mailbox into our condo yelling, "It's here! The letter is here!" Andrew jumped from his chair, saw the letter and knew that the news couldn't be good. He calmly sat down, opened the letter and his head dropped. I remember him telling me the bad news but the moment that will forever remain burned in my brain is seeing the light and hopefulness leave his face and his body being taken over by worry, anger and confusion.
The letter began:
"The School of Medicine Admissions Committee voted to defer a final decision regarding your application. This means that your application will be reconsidered during the Regular Admissions Program."
I read:
"The School of Medicine Admissions Committee is full of a bunch of tools who don't know what they're missing out on by deferring their final decision regarding your application. This means that you and your wife, who moved to Augusta to be a part of the MCG community, now have to spend another 4-8 months waiting to hear whether or not we decided to take our heads out of our asses and finally accept you into the program you deserve to be a part of."
The hours between the time we received the decision and our heads hit our pillows were torture. Last time, when he was wait-listed, I didn't have to see the disappointment in his face because I was in Nashville. I cannot even begin to explain the weight that landed on my heart when Andrew's body slumped in disappointment. How do I console him? How do I make this okay? How in the world are we going to deal with more waiting? There is no manual that tells you how to approach a situation like this. I was helpless to alleviate any of the hurt Andrew was feeling and before the night was over, I had totally broken down and Andrew was lost. We didn't really know what to do next as we were facing a scarily uncertain future.
But a new day brings new hope and before I even woke up, Andrew had begun the application process to three more M.D. schools as well as three D.O. schools. My amazing husband had woken up with the determination not to let this keep him down. His dream is to be a doctor, he is meant to help others through medicine and he is unwilling to give up his abilities and dreams because an admissions committee said, "maybe later."
Now, the application to D.O. schools has to be completed and then the waiting begins yet again. After the big applications are in, we wait to hear whether or not he has been asked to fill out a secondary application. If a secondary is completed, we then wait to hear whether or not he has been given an interview. And then if he has an interview, we wait some more to hear if he has been accepted, wait-listed or rejected. This process could take anywhere from 2 months to 8 months.
Augusta remains our temporary home until we know if it will become permanent or Andrew has gotten in somewhere else. And for now, I am continuing my job hunt just in case he ends up being accepted to MCG, Andrew is still working in the cancer center and we are enjoying married life.
I am extremely proud of my cute, smart husband for taking this challenge head on and grateful to my parents for supporting us through this new journey. We're just waiting to see where it takes us.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
why does it have to go bad?
It has been three months since Andrew and I got married and we are having such a great time. There wasn't really any transition period and we seem to have moved seamlessly into married life. After being in different towns/states for five years, we are sincerely enjoying each others company; seeing each other every day, eating dinner together and kissing each other goodnight.
Does this excitement have to end? Is it inevitable that we will become an old married couple that bickers like so many others we have seen?
One thing that really bothers me is when people ask how married life is going and when I tell them we are really enjoying it, they inevitably say, "we'll see how long that lasts" or "just wait until you've been married for a couple of years." When people say that, I want to shout out loud, "why did you even ask?!?!?" Seriously, people. I get that marriage is difficult. I get that we might come up against times in our marriage where we might wonder what we got ourselves into. I also know who we are and how our relationship works.
Maybe this is newlywed bliss or simple naivety but I believe that we have control over our relationship and our marriage will become what we want it to. If we put everything we have into our marriage while maintaining our individual identities and growing a family, why does it have to go bad? (And yes, as soon as I typed that last sentence I realized that it is easier said than done.)
I know that marriages can lose their spark, that couples can get tired of each other and that time and children can take their toll. We entered into this marriage knowing that difficulties come long with it. Before deciding to get married, we both knew that this was it: there will be no ducking out when times get hard. We came into this relationship and marriage prepared to do whatever it takes to make it work and to keep our relationship solid.
So when these people say "you're still in the honeymoon phase" or "just wait until you've been married for 10 years and see what you think", I become even more determined to keep the honeymoon period going as long as possible.
Andrew is an amazing man being who keeps me smiling and laughing every day. Communication is at the center of our relationship, we agree on finances and have the same desires for the future. When I look at him, I get excited to continue in this marriage, have children and spend 75 + years together.
Why does it only go south from here? What will I think in 10 years and why does it have to be worse than what we have now? If this is the honeymoon phase, I hope it just continues and gets better and better with each difficult situation/decision, glorious moment and kiss goodnight.
*You married person/people out there in blogland, any insight for me? I welcome it with open arms and ears.*
Does this excitement have to end? Is it inevitable that we will become an old married couple that bickers like so many others we have seen?
One thing that really bothers me is when people ask how married life is going and when I tell them we are really enjoying it, they inevitably say, "we'll see how long that lasts" or "just wait until you've been married for a couple of years." When people say that, I want to shout out loud, "why did you even ask?!?!?" Seriously, people. I get that marriage is difficult. I get that we might come up against times in our marriage where we might wonder what we got ourselves into. I also know who we are and how our relationship works.
Maybe this is newlywed bliss or simple naivety but I believe that we have control over our relationship and our marriage will become what we want it to. If we put everything we have into our marriage while maintaining our individual identities and growing a family, why does it have to go bad? (And yes, as soon as I typed that last sentence I realized that it is easier said than done.)
I know that marriages can lose their spark, that couples can get tired of each other and that time and children can take their toll. We entered into this marriage knowing that difficulties come long with it. Before deciding to get married, we both knew that this was it: there will be no ducking out when times get hard. We came into this relationship and marriage prepared to do whatever it takes to make it work and to keep our relationship solid.
So when these people say "you're still in the honeymoon phase" or "just wait until you've been married for 10 years and see what you think", I become even more determined to keep the honeymoon period going as long as possible.
Andrew is an amazing man being who keeps me smiling and laughing every day. Communication is at the center of our relationship, we agree on finances and have the same desires for the future. When I look at him, I get excited to continue in this marriage, have children and spend 75 + years together.
Why does it only go south from here? What will I think in 10 years and why does it have to be worse than what we have now? If this is the honeymoon phase, I hope it just continues and gets better and better with each difficult situation/decision, glorious moment and kiss goodnight.
*You married person/people out there in blogland, any insight for me? I welcome it with open arms and ears.*
Monday, September 7, 2009
the glorious month of September
I really enjoy this month. September is filled with anticipation for me as football season begins and I wait for fall to blow its cool winds my way. And this year, September is also a month of anticipation for the ultimate decision...the med school acceptance or rejection.
I LOVE college football. Before attending UGA, I didn't really have a true passion for it. Even though I attended every Georgia Tech football game for 4 seasons while a friend of ours played for the Yellow Jackets, I never really yearned for football season. Once I became a bulldog, it seemed that football became a part of who I was. I lived for fall and football season. There is nothing like waking up on a Saturday, putting on your team colors and knowing that you will be cheering on your team that day.
Our UGA Bulldogs are going to have a tough season in 2009 but that does not mean that I won't be cheering them on the whole way. After our first game this past weekend, we aren't expecting a whole heck of a lot from our silver britches this season but we are still proud to call them our team.
Andrew and I were talking the other day about how much we love the fall. It is at the beginning of the fall that we are the furthest away from the hot and humid days of summer. This is not to say that the summer season is not amazing with the beach trips and sun tans, but the heat can really wear you down. Fall is the perfect mix of crisp coolness and anticipation of familial holidays that we both love so much.
I am just learning exactly how much Andrew likes Halloween. Though I have never been a huge fan, I am excited to see his enthusiasm for it. Thanksgiving is the holiday celebrated most in each of our families and we look forward to it every year.
We are inching closer to Andrew getting news of his acceptance or rejection to MCG. With less than a month to go, he is doing amazingly well and keeping himself occupied with football (both college and NFL). I have a really good feeling about it as does my Mom who seems to have a good intuition with these things. Everything points to acceptance except for the knowledge that we thought acceptance was a sure bet last time and we were knocked on our asses with the news of being put on the wait list.
This time we are realistic about the possibility of rejection and though we are not planning for either decision, I feel prepared for both. I am not quite sure that Andrew could really prepare himself for the decision but I know that he will handle it no matter which way it goes. He never ceases to amaze me with his calm and ability to move forward with any situation. We are crossing our fingers and waiting for the packet to come in the mail. October 1 is the deadline for an answer and they went out a little early last year. We'll just have to see...
So as September starts to fly by (I cannot believe it is already the 7th), I would like to take a moment and express my appreciation for this wonderful month. Thank you, God, for September, UGA football, crisp, cool autumn seasons and wonderful holidays with family. And please, God, let this decision come swiftly and help us move on in whatever direction it takes us. Amen.
I LOVE college football. Before attending UGA, I didn't really have a true passion for it. Even though I attended every Georgia Tech football game for 4 seasons while a friend of ours played for the Yellow Jackets, I never really yearned for football season. Once I became a bulldog, it seemed that football became a part of who I was. I lived for fall and football season. There is nothing like waking up on a Saturday, putting on your team colors and knowing that you will be cheering on your team that day.Our UGA Bulldogs are going to have a tough season in 2009 but that does not mean that I won't be cheering them on the whole way. After our first game this past weekend, we aren't expecting a whole heck of a lot from our silver britches this season but we are still proud to call them our team.
Andrew and I were talking the other day about how much we love the fall. It is at the beginning of the fall that we are the furthest away from the hot and humid days of summer. This is not to say that the summer season is not amazing with the beach trips and sun tans, but the heat can really wear you down. Fall is the perfect mix of crisp coolness and anticipation of familial holidays that we both love so much.
I am just learning exactly how much Andrew likes Halloween. Though I have never been a huge fan, I am excited to see his enthusiasm for it. Thanksgiving is the holiday celebrated most in each of our families and we look forward to it every year.
We are inching closer to Andrew getting news of his acceptance or rejection to MCG. With less than a month to go, he is doing amazingly well and keeping himself occupied with football (both college and NFL). I have a really good feeling about it as does my Mom who seems to have a good intuition with these things. Everything points to acceptance except for the knowledge that we thought acceptance was a sure bet last time and we were knocked on our asses with the news of being put on the wait list.This time we are realistic about the possibility of rejection and though we are not planning for either decision, I feel prepared for both. I am not quite sure that Andrew could really prepare himself for the decision but I know that he will handle it no matter which way it goes. He never ceases to amaze me with his calm and ability to move forward with any situation. We are crossing our fingers and waiting for the packet to come in the mail. October 1 is the deadline for an answer and they went out a little early last year. We'll just have to see...
So as September starts to fly by (I cannot believe it is already the 7th), I would like to take a moment and express my appreciation for this wonderful month. Thank you, God, for September, UGA football, crisp, cool autumn seasons and wonderful holidays with family. And please, God, let this decision come swiftly and help us move on in whatever direction it takes us. Amen.
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